This week was our topic was Clear Conscience and we had a speaker, Ken Mulligan, come from Townsville. There he is a part of another YWAM base, where he is also in charge of the Mercy Ships. These ships go into counties like Papa New Genie and other third world countries that have severe health issues and they try to give free medical treatment to these people as a way of evangelizing. Our typical week starts on Tuesday and the speakers speak on the topic each day until Friday when they wrap everything up. So Ken spoke on the basics of ways to help us develop a Clear Conscience and how to maintain it to help us strengthen and have a deeper relationship with God.
My Sports DTS program has been great and I have developed a very close knit relationship with everyone here and I have already grown to know all of them very well. We have only been her two weeks and I already feel the community atmosphere that YWAM creates and I feel like I have a whole other family here.
This week we primarily dealt with the topic of true repentance and how conviction is a good thing. We also learned how to apply the Ten Commandments to our live to help us to clear our conscience. To me I have always thought and been taught that conviction is something that condemns us for our sins. Well we were informed that conviction is a good thing and is a correction to help us better see into the light, which is Christ. We also learned that to be condemned is to be casted into darkness and not to be able to see the light. It is very interesting that we as Christian see conviction as a bad thing yet it is something that we should rejoice in because it is how God shows us His love, like a parent correcting their kid’s behavior to make them a better person. We all sin and we also do things that are undesirable and undesirable to God and He wants to convict of things that are good and bad because if we are just convicted of things that are sin then we have only received negative love. This week I have been convicted of things of not fully trusting in God with my heart, living an impure life, and also not being a proper disciple of Christ.
The Ten Commandments also go with conviction and Ken primarily focused on the fifth Commandment, which tells us to honor and obey our parents. This is something that was very hard for me to understand as I only had one parent through my childhood as most of you know. It is not that I am resentful of my life because the events have led me to where I am today and I think I am at a great spot. But it was hard for me to understand how I am to honor or respect and obey my parents when one of them hasn’t been around my whole life. So here I was judging my mom for not being there and not taking into account the things that have happened in her life. Not condoning anything that she did yet 1 Corinthians 4:4-5 says,” 4 my conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. 5 Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait until the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart. At that time each will receive their praise from God.” So here I was battling forgiveness and not understanding what it was all about and how it was so difficult for me to forgive yet still I was forgiven for my sins. This verse put things in perspective for me and I was able to realize that not only was I hurting my relationship with Christ by not forgiving, but I was also judging and that is not my place as it is God’s when we come before Him. So today I have chosen to forgive my mom for the things she has done or failed to do and have started forgiving her each and every day. Forgiveness is like a cut on your arm and you have to first start to disinfect it, bandage it, then it begins to heal and scabs over and piece by piece it starts to heal properly. It is a constant battle to forgive and I have found that each day I have to choose to forgive again and that is how we give our hearts over to Christ.
The best thing that happened this week was that we got to take time after lecture and a few of the people in my class were called out to pray for someone who God had on their heart. Daniel, one of my classmates, prayed for me as he was spoken to by God and told that I was struggling with issues of childhood and getting over a barrier. At this point God spoke to me through him and told me to put my hands out to Him and to look up to the Him. This was something that was a little different from me and yet seemed to just bring everything that was on my mind and heart into the open as I spoke out to God those things. My stomach then began to start to pump and almost seem like it was rolling and then I began to cry and while tears ran down my face it went numb and so did my hands that were still extended out to God. This was the weirdest sensation that I had ever felt and after thinking about it later that night I knew exactly what had happened, I had been filled with the Holy Spirit. For some of you it may be something you have experienced and yet some of you may never experience it, but it was something that made me realize that it was okay to be weak because God is strong and will fight for us.
We also got to go to the beach this week and have a Barbie, that is a BBQ, and have sausages and play soccer on the sand with kids who are of mental handicaps or older guys who were once on drugs. This was something that was amazing as we got to interact with people in the community and have great fellowship with them. Later that night we had another Barbie at one of our Youth Street crew’s house and we got to play some cricket and enjoy some indigenous people doing their cultural dances, a true Aussie experience. I also got to experience my first Vegemite and cheese sausage, which too much of the Australian people surprised I liked. It was amazing food and it is great for parents of our Youth Street crew to open there homes because they appreciate what we are doing, that is the evidence that we are making an impact.
This past week was one that was very intense and according to our speaker, Ken, and our leaders and staff we have far exceeded expectations. We are extremely engaged in topics and have great class discussions and times of sharing that most DTS’s don’t exemplify. We are far more advanced in the second week than any other DTS classes and I think that is amazing and as we continue it will only get better and make our sports DTS group closer.
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